【免费泛听材料】9 Life Lessons by Tim Minchin(附文本+翻译）

 Here we go, ready?

来吧，准备好了吗？

One: You don’t have to have a dream. Americans on talent shows always talk about their dreams. Fine if you have something you’ve always wanted to do, dreamed of, like in your heart, go for it. After all it’s something to do with your time, chasing a dream. And if it’s a big enough one it’ll take you most of your life to achieve so by the time you get to it and are staring into the abyss of the meaningless of your achievement you’ll be almost dead so it won’t matter.

一：你不一定要拥有梦想。美国才艺节目总是在谈梦想。好吧，如果你有什么事情是你一直想做的，打心底想去完成的，那就去做吧。毕竟，追求梦想也算是打发时间的一种方式，如果这个梦想足够大，可能要花上一辈子去完成，当你最终实现梦想的时候，回头看看你那毫无意义所谓的成就，你都已经快死了，所以也无所谓了。

I never really had one of these dreams and so I advocate passionate, dedication to the pursuit of short-term goals. Be micro-ambitious. Put your head down and work with pride on whatever is in front of you. You never know where you might end up. Just be aware the next worthy pursuit will probably appear in your periphery, which is why you should be careful of long-term dreams. If you focus too far in front of you you won’t see the shiny thing out the corner of your eye. 

我从来都没有那种远大的梦想，所以我提倡热情，全心全意的追逐短期目标，在小目标上保持雄心壮志。埋头苦干并以此为乐，专注在眼前的事物。你永远都不知道你的终点会在哪里。留意一下你下一个值得追逐的目标，很可能就在你身边，这就是你为什么要小心看待长远的梦想。如果你把目光放得太远，你可能会因此而错失眼前耀眼的机会。

Two: Don’t seek happiness. Happiness is like an orgasm. If you think about it too much it goes away. Keep busy and aim to make someone else happy and you might find you get some as a side effect. We didn’t evolve to be constantly content. Contented Homo erectus got eaten before passing on their genes.

二：别刻意寻找幸福。幸福就像性高潮一样，如果你一直心里想着，很快就没了。用心去做，专注给别人带来快乐，你可能会因此得到快乐。人类的进化并没有让我们永远满足，安逸的原始人在延续基因前早就被吃掉了。

Three: Remember it’s all luck. You are lucky to be here. You are incalculably lucky to be born. Understanding that you can’t truly take credit for your successes nor truly blame others for their failures will humble you and make you more compassionate. Empathy is intuitive. It is also something you can work on intellectually.

三：记住，一切都是运气使然。你很幸运能坐着这里。你超级幸运，才来到这个世界。如你了解到你的成就并不完全是你的功劳，而失败也不能把过失完全归咎于他人，这会让你更谦逊，会让你更有同情心。同理心是种直觉，但你也可以用你的智慧去栽培它。

Four: Exercise. I’m sorry you pasty, pale, smoking philosophy grads arching your eyebrows into a Cartesian curve as you watch the human movement mob winding their way through the miniature traffic cones of their existence. You are wrong and they are right. Well you’re half right. You think therefore you are but also you jog therefore you sleep therefore you’re not overwhelmed by existential angst. You can’t be Kant and you don’t want to be. Play a sport. Do yoga, pump iron, and run, whatever but take care of your body, you’re going to need it. Most of you mob are going to live to nearly 100 and even the poorest of you will achieve a level of wealth that most humans throughout history could not have dreamed of. And this long, luxurious life ahead of you is going to make you depressed. 

四：去运动。你们这群秃头抽烟的哲学系学生，当你皱起眉头，就像笛卡尔曲线一样，当你看着人类，为了生存，在拥挤的人生道路上力争上游。你错了，他们才是对的。好吧，你对了一半。你思故你在，但同时，你跑故你睡，故你才不会被存在主义式的焦虑所淹没。你不会成为康德，你也不想成为他。去运动，做瑜伽、举重、跑步都可以。总之要照顾好你自己的身体。你晚些时候会需要它的。你们大多数人会活到接近100岁，就算你们之间最穷的，以后累积的财富都是历史上大多数人从未想象过的富裕程度。而在这奢华的漫漫人生路，将会让你抑郁。

Five: Be hard on your opinions. A famous bon motasserts opinions are like assholes in that everyone has one. There is great wisdom in this but I would add that opinions differ significantly from assholes in that yours should be constantly and thoroughly examined.

五：严格审视自己的意见。有句著名的箴言是这么说的，意见就像屁眼，每个人都有一个。这里面包含了伟大的智慧啊，但是我想加个重要的补充，那就是你应该经常的、彻底的检查你的屁眼/观点。

We must think critically and not just about the ideas of others. Be hard on your beliefs. Take them out onto the verandah and hit them with a cricket bat. Be intellectually rigorous. Identify your biases, your prejudices, your privileges. Most of society arguments are kept alive by a failure to acknowledge nuance. We tend to generate false dichotomies and then try to argue one point using two entirely different sets of assumptions. Like two tennis players trying to win a match by hitting beautifully executed shots from either end of separate tennis courts.

我们要明辨思考，并不只是对他人的意见如此。更是要严格的审视自己坚信的事物。带他们到走廊上， 用棒球拍那样狠狠的重击它。严格审视自己的知识。认清你的成见、歧视、还有特权。社会上多数争论的起源，都是在细微差别下无法获得认同。我们经常产生假象二元对立。用两种不同的假设去争论一个问题。就像两个网球选手相互尝试打出更漂亮的击球，只为了打赢比赛。

Six: Be a teacher! Please! Please! Please be a teacher. Teachers are the most admirable and important people in the world. You don’t have to do it forever but if you’re in doubt about what to do, be an amazing teacher. Even if you’re not a teacher, be a teacher. Share your ideas. Don’t take for granted your education. Rejoice in what you learn and spray it.

六：当个老师。拜托！拜托！拜托当个老师！老师是个令人崇敬和重要的职业。你不需要一辈子当老师。加入你不知道自己想做什么，那就当个老师吧。即便你不是老师，当个老师，分享你的观点。别把你学的东西当作理所当然，把你所学的传播出去，回馈社会。

Seven: Define yourself by what you love. I found myself doing this thing a bit recently where if someone asks me what sort of music I like I say, “Well I don’t listen to the radio because pop song lyrics annoy me,” or if someone asks me what food I like I say, “I think truffle oil is overused and slightly obnoxious.” And I see it all the time online – people whose idea of being part of a subculture is to hate Coldplay or football or feminists or the Liberal Party.

七：以喜好来定义自己。我发现自己最近在做这件事，当有人问我，你喜欢什么类型的音乐，我会回答说，我不爱听电台，因为流行歌的歌词让我很烦。当有人问我喜欢吃什么，我说，松露油被过度使用了，而且有点不好闻。我在网络上经常看到，人们对于此文化的认同，是讨厌酷玩乐队或者讨厌足球，反对女权主义或者自由党。

We have a tendency to define ourselves in opposition to stuff. As a comedian I make my living out of it. But try to also express your passion for things you love. Be demonstrative and generous in your praise of those you admire. Send thank you cards and give standing ovations. Be pro stuff not just anti stuff.

我们倾向于用讨厌和反对的事物来定义自己。作为一个喜剧演员，我靠这个为生。但你可以试着对你所爱的事情表达你的热情，对你欣赏的事大方的给予赞美，写感谢卡，给予起立鼓掌，对事情给予正面评价，而不是只懂得反对。

Eight: Respect people with less power than you. I have in the past made important decisions about people I work with – agents and producers – big decisions based largely on how they treat the wait staff in the restaurants we’re having the meeting in. I don’t care if you’re the most powerful cat in the room, I will judge you on how you treat the least powerful. So there!

八：尊重比你弱小的人。以前我每次作出重要决定时，比如像是工作上对接的经纪人或者制作人，通常更重要的决定，取决于我们在餐厅讨论时，他们对待服务生的态度。我不管你是多大的咖，我会评价你如何对待比你弱小人的态度。就是这样。

Nine: Finally, don’t rush. You don’t need to already know what you’re going to do with the rest of your life. Don’t panic. 

you will soon be dead.

九：最后，别急。 你不必现在就知道你整个人生的全盘计划。别慌。反正你早晚都是要死。

Life will sometimes seem long and tough and God it’s tiring. And you will sometimes be happy and sometimes sad and then you’ll be old and then you’ll be dead. There is only one sensible thing to do with this empty existence and that is fill it. Not fillet. Fill it. And in my opinion, until I change it, life is best filled by learning as much as you can about as much as you can. Taking pride in whatever you’re doing. Having compassion, sharing ideas, running, being enthusiastic and then there’s love and travel and wine and sex and art and kids and giving and mountain climbing, but you know all that stuff already. It’s an incredibly exciting thing this one meaningless life of yours. Good luck and thank you for indulging me.”

人生有时候看起来漫长又痛苦，天啊，超级累的。当然，有开心的时候，也会有难过的时候，然后你就老了，然后死去。对于这虚无的纯在感，你能做的一个明智的决定就是，充实它，不是鱼柳，是充实它。到目前为止，我个人认为，最充实的人生就是尽量去学习，能学多少学多少，无论做什么事情都引以为豪，保持同情心，无私分享，去跑步，保持热忱。当然少不了爱情、旅行、葡萄酒、性爱、艺术、孩子、施舍和爬山之类的。这些你们都已经知道了。真是无与伦比的令人振奋啊，你这这看起来毫无意义的人生。祝大家好运，谢谢大家的宠爱！