【轻阅读，看世界】What is the hardest part in starting a new relationship?

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I used to walk five miles every day. I used to study Thai or Spanish for at least an hour each day. I wrote, I traveled, I studied, I read.

Then, I met Daniel. He’s so wonderful. I wanted to spend all of my time with him. Even though we were long distance, I wanted to talk to him as much as possible.

Suddenly, at least three hours out of my day were gone. Studying languages barely happened, I didn’t exercise as much, I stopped reading. Daniel came first because being with him felt so good.

But one day, I realized I felt like I had lost myself. So many qualities I admired in myself had been squashed. My drive to learn new things, my focus in studying languages, my love of exercising, they had all but disappeared.

I pulled away from Daniel. I started little fights with him because in a way I blamed him. I felt he took all my time and now I didn’t like myself as much. That wasn’t fair, it wasn’t his fault. I was a very willing participant. I had to work on balancing my time with him on balancing time for myself.

I think the hardest part in starting a new relationship is losing yourself in the relationship. It’s hard to make room for this new person in your life without taking parts of yourself away. Love is addictive, it’s hard to break away from it.

But it is possible to love and develop yourself while loving another, it just takes practice.